calm in the storm
If there's one thing I really don't like, it's crowded places and chaotic environments. I don't just not like them, I will deliberately go out of my way to avoid them. Even if I desperately need egg whites for my lemon meringue, if I walk into the and there are carts suffocating the aisles, I'm out. I will happily drive around the neighborhood and waste time before trying to go back; or I will drive to a store twice as far away. Yes, I do have anxiety. (Not a joke, blog post on this soon to follow.)
This being said, I did all my christmas shopping in one day, a month before christmas, and from the comfort of my sweet, silent bed. God bless you, mother Amazon. I can't think of a better resource available to me other than online shopping. I can literally be in my pajamas and browsing face creams at the same time, while not one person will run into me with their cart, sneeze on me, hit on me, or let their kids scream and knock over store displays in front of me. It's absolute bliss.
Coming full circle, I have a love/hate relationship with the holidays. I love the weather, the coziness, togetherness of family, the scents, the tastes, and the trends, but I hate the crazy consumerism of American people. The fact that people sleep in tents outside best buy to get the new tv or iphone first, and then literally throw punches or run over people with their shopping cart on their way out, is frankly disgusting. I can't understand it, so I try to keep my distance from it. this Christmas however, was something very different. I avoided the crazy, and it was perfect. It was calm.
My siblings and I had a very religious upbringing and were not allowed to celebrate holidays other than our birthdays. Since my seven younger siblings have never known what a christmas morning feels like, my older brother, his wife, and I decided to have a christmas without our parents and show them. Starting a new tradition independent of our parents' preferences, no offense, was very exciting. not to mention my sister-in-law just had a baby, so the most beautiful 3-week-old specimen was the center of everyone's attention. I don't know what it is about newborn babies, but they have the power to make the toughest men (my brothers) soft, and the craziest people (me) calm. it was the sweetest addition to our holiday and the calm in the storm. Together, we watched christmas movies in our matching pajamas (only took me 2 weeks and 3 returns to find all the right sizes for my giraffe-like siblings), sipped each other's drinks, ate each other's food, reminisced on childhood stories, cuddled, cried, exchanged some hilarious presents, and laughed until we fell asleep on top of each other. Nothing about it was choatic and it felt like everything in our life had happened for a reason because it brought us exactly where we were supposed to be. It was the best Christmas.
